15 January 2013
Why You Should Be Friends With a Nerd
You should be friends with a nerd. A nerd will not really know how to be with you all the time, but will always try her best. She will treasure all the moments that the two of you spent together, because she doesn't really have any friends to call her own. She is really afraid to lose you, and will never forgive herself if she did any wrong to you. Sometimes, it may take her years to get over what she has done. She will try to remember what you sounded like, what you looked like.
When you need your nerd, she'll be there. She'll never leave you when all of your other friends leave you. She'll walk you home in the middle of the night because she's scared something will happen to you if you go yourself. Sometimes, when she does something stupid, you laugh, but then she is pretty happy because she has made a friend laugh. She treats everybody as a friend, but she is pretty scarred from past relationships. She wants to say that you mean almost the world for her because you are her friend, but every time she wants to say it, you are with your friends.
Then you two are hanging out for the first time. She is really quiet, not because she doesn't have anything to say, but because she wants you to do most of the talking. She loves the way words come out of your mouth. Although she wants to say how good you look in your outfit, she doesn't want to say it out loud because she's afraid it will come out wrong. Whenever she looks in your eyes, she marvels at the different colors it turns as the light hits it at different angles. Everything you do seems right, you seems like the perfect person to her. She likes her friends all the same, only that there aren't that many.
Then, your birthday comes around. She forgot that the day was your birthday, and forgot to bring you a present because she was studying for a test earlier, and totally forgot. Although she brought you a present later, she was afraid that you would always hate her for forgetting your birthday. She made a promise to herself to never forget again. You never really remembered, and never held a grudge over this thing.
Then there was your first fight together. You were screaming your head at her, screaming how much you hated her. You never mentioned how when you were surrounded by strangers wanting to take your money, and how she helped you out. She never reminded you how scared she was, how she decided not to turn around and run when you were surrounded by thugs. How her mouth tasted when she was slapped across the face, how her body felt after it was beat up by 5 guys that were all twice her size because she did not know how to fight back. How she had to lie to her mom about where the bruises and cuts came from. You seem to have forgotten all that.
Then you tell her in this cold voice how your friendship is all over. How you feel as if it is right for the two of you to not see each other again, and it's all for the best.
The nerd lies on her bed and stares at the ceiling. She just lies there for hours on end, trying to make sense of what happened to her. And she tries to imagine life before she met you, and realizes that it's going to take a long time.