A Bad First Date

One of my friends have this really good story about a disastrous first date that I feel as if I have the obligation to share with everybody. I regret to say that I was the mutual friend who introduced them together. What I was thinking at that time was that they were fit for each other and they would make a cute couple. On hindsight, they were the most unfit couple that I have ever seen. I was only going for looks at that time. It was a blind date on both sides, and they were only going on mutual trust in me. They had never met each other, and were naturally very excited to see each other. But on the other hand, because they did not know ANYTHING at all about the other, and was scared of what they would get. For all they knew, I could have had them going to their deaths in the hands of a serial killer. Just for clarity, let's call the girl Julie and the guy Nick.

The moment they met each other, Julie noticed that Nick was about the same height as she was. Although surprised, she chose not to say anything because she was afraid of hurting his feelings. I was shocked to hear this because I thought they did not have a really noticeable height difference. Oops on my part. But anyway, Julie was also disappointed about her date's looks. Guess she expected a hot, sexy dude or something.

Anyway, the date started. Pretty soon, Julie and Nick found that their interests and whatnot differed by a pretty big margin. I mean, when I say a pretty big margin, I mean almost complete opposites of each other. Their views and values were pretty different, and the gap between them were beyond huge. In the words of Julie, "A shadow crossed Nick's face every time my differed from his. Which was Pretty soon, they seemed to be at each others' throats at every subject.

In a short while, they met up with some other friends at some other location. Nick didn't seem as if he was cool about breaking the date halfway to meet other people, but he didn't voice any objections. They had a few drinks, and everything seemed fine. At least when they were around other people. Everything SEEMED fine, but there were cracks showing up already. And it was only the first date.

Both of them were in a dark mood by the time they were out of the bar. At that point, they had stopped caring what the other was thinking. They felt that going with other people would be able to melt their differences. It didn't work. What's worse, I think that the couple of drinks that they drank made the date worse than it already was. If I was there, I would not have let the date go down the path that it did. But I doubt that either cared about each other at that point. I guess both of them were too bitter to even look at each other. Although I wasn't on scene to see (why would I go on their date with them anyway?), I guess they already realized that they were not fit for each other. Their differences were too huge to be ignored.

Nick later said that they should have kept their date to themselves instead of going with other people. Julie informed him that it was his idea to go with friends at the bar. Nick didn't really have anything to say to that. I mean, what was the big deal? It was just a drink, and it wasn't as if they were embarrassed to know each other. Well, I keep convincing myself that what I believe is true. Nick went on to say how sick he was of girls playing with him, and how he wanted a "true" girl, and how Julie was too superficial for him. They should not have agreed to do this date thing in the first place, he added. 

Julie stood in silence this whole while, not saying how sick she was of guys playing with her too. They were both sick and tired of trying to find the "right" one. No one ever felt right, and as the years passed, they grow more and more frustrated. 

What really bothered me about their first date was that I came to the realization that looks are often not enough. To truly function as a pair of people, they have to have the same basic ideologies and principles. The mistake that I made was to introduce two people who are so different they are on opposite sides of the planet. Which probably explains why I don't trust myself on dating issues.